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Welcome to Health and Safety Jokes.

A collection of safety jokes, mostly old ones and the origins are unknown. Some have been rewritten for "safetyphoto"


Its good to laugh

Joke Ratings and Safety

All jokes containing humorous, sarcastic, parodical, and /or satirical passages, or any other jokes not intended to be taken seriously must be labeled prominently in the header as follows:

  1. The Subject header must contain at some point, the string "HA!".
  2.  The Keywords line shall contain a summary of the hazard levels present in the joke, ranked on a scale of 0-5 in the following categories, in the order:
    1. humor,
    2. sarcasm,
    3. satire:
  1. No hazard
  2.  Slight hazard
  3.  Moderate hazard
  4.  Extreme hazard
  5.  Critical hazard

Any jokes not assessed will be deemed lazy and incompetent management.


  • If any of these jokes are registered copyright please let me know and I will remove.
  • All material is believed to be in the public domain.
  • If an article does not have the appropriate credits please contact safetyphoto
  • Original and restructured jokes are the copyright of "safetyphoto" although they are free to use, but not for comercial gain (same rules as the photos)